Somebody was asking me my comment on “A woman without her man is nothing”. I don’t know what to say really on this sentence. I am neither woman nor I read feminine books. But let me do some analysis of the sentence.
On emotional grounds ultimately what everybody seeks is happiness. Happiness is another form of feeling good about yourself. How do you feel good about yourself? You see in mirror and look at your face. Mirror says, “you look beautiful”, you feel happy. You put on nice fancy make up and go to college, all the boys in your class look at you, may be somebody with good confidence comes forward and whispers in your ear ,”you are looking good!”. And you feel happy! You do some intelligent work, your boss or colleagues appreciate that, you feel good! You do good deeds for society many members of society will love you.. and you feel good. Are you understanding the pattern in these examples? I am trying to stress a point that for being happy it is necessary that somebody from outside iterates on your inner feeling of being good or better. It is about being loved! yes one constantly strives for getting loved by others. It is basic human nature to seek love from outside. But why on earth one should seek love from outside? Because even strongest people on this earth are weak from inside, they know it. Because they know about their weakness, they feel insecure! Getting loved is better way of feeling safe in this world.
But you will understand there is basic flaw in this strategy if you are not going to have a close one to love you…. for simple reasons as I can see. Not so close people to you will not be sufficient to satisfy your need of getting loved. You will not look into mirror all the time when there is glow on your face… you might see gloomy yourself sometimes in the mirror. And mirror will say , “you look ugly”. That will make you insecure! That will turn your mood even down! College days are going to be over soon… there will be day finally when people outside will not have enough of time to appreciate your make up even if you try best to attract them! There will be time when colleagues would not notice your intelligent work. There will be time when society is not enough to cater your psychological needs of feeling good. So there will be time when you need somebody to whom you can tell frankly … cry your heart out, “I am not doing well, I need your help”… This is where I feel comes the part of a person , so called life partner. Life partner is to appreciate your beauty even when you are in the most gloomy mood. He is the one who will give you romantic kick of “you are most beautiful woman in my life” .. he is the one who will appreciate your dumb work too. He is the one who will give you feeling of security. …. in-spite of your weaknesses he would love you. And he would be the one who will help you getting to higher spiritual level , ultimately at that level where to be happy in life you won’t need even his help anymore. Looks like without life partner it is difficult to get nirvana 😉
Now I don’t understand how people make one sided statements. Why on earth the one who feels insecure has to be a woman? These things hold good even for men! So even a man needs a woman life partner to satisfy his psychological needs! So why not say “A man without his woman is nothing”. Possibly there is other way of saying it for men, “Behind every successful man there is a woman”. He he 🙂 this will take care of male ego too!
I think discussion holds true for a regular common human beings, but there are self disciplined and strong people like Vivekananda, Mother Teresa etc. and other great sages and revolutionary people who handle the life single handed. These kinds of people are strong enough and are already at the highest spiritual level where they need NO external help to feel good!